HOLY CRAP. Detroilet.

This would be pretty hilarious if it weren't so disturbing. The Chairman of the Detroit School Board can't write. He can't write himself out of a paper bag. He can't even write himself off.

Ridiculous.

Denial Leaves Egypt, Runs Through UK

Seriously. Seriously? Seriously.

Express.co.uk - Home of the Daily and Sunday Express | UK News :: Weather: Hottest January ever say climate experts

Bill Maher: Unfunny. Uninspired. Unoriginal.

What a TOOL. It's no wonder Joy Behar hasn't found anyone "around [me]" who has any sympathy for Dick Cheney. She runs around with her dog and her housekeeper and she's a NY tool.

I'm sure both of her viewers totally cracked up when Maher made his comment. Maher's viewer wasn't available for comment.

Laundry List of Dem Idiots

Obama. Clinton. Schumer. Reid. Feinstein. Biden. Dodd. Baucus.

Apparently, Sen. Reid has stated that he'll push to pass socialized medicine...er..."healthcare reform" with the minimum 51 votes.

"Arrogance of power" rears its head again.

Sen. Reid's memory only goes back five years.

Apparently God didn't listen to Joe Biden's prayers.

Roe v. Wade FAIL

Oops. Dr. Death in Philadelphia gives us a glimpse of all the fund stuff that happens when you allow abortions.

Read about all the frozen fun here.

Robert Gibbs: Press Conference FAIL

Robert Gibbs is a tool. He is unfunny, unwatchable and uninspired. He's Jim Rome's triple-U press secretary. Now, he's uninformed.

Behold the White House publicly saying "where's the GOP beef?"

Behold the location of said beef--where it's been for months.

Relax, Robert. I'll handle it.

Dramatic Olbermann vs. Dramatic Chipmunk - Hit & Run : Reason Magazine

Dramatic Olbermann vs. Dramatic Chipmunk - Hit & Run : Reason Magazine

Awesome.

YouTube - Dallas Tea Party Invites White People at MSNBC

YouTube - Dallas Tea Party Invites White People at MSNBC

Olbermann diatribe FAIL.

Proof that America is Actually Getting Smarter

CNN's ratings last night.

Colin Cowherd was railing on Anderson Cooper [look how serious he is on his page--what a tool] yesterday. I loved every minute of it. [Colin Cowherd is one of the most clever sports talk hosts.] Cooper guy cut his teeth on Channel One, a hokey, cheesy newscast beamed directly into the skulls of high schoolers around the country. He never impressed me in the years I was forced to watch as a high school teacher. I was always more interested in Serena Altschul and Lisa Ling. Of course, Lisa's a kook now, too.

A source I have at CBS News, who's worked with Cooper tells me he's an empty head. Not an empty suit, an empty head.

The Debate is Over. Phil Jones Said So

According to Phil Jones, who is the director of the Climactic Research Unit at the University of East Anglia--the one where data went "a-missin'" and hacked emails showed that data was inconveniently lost, there has been no "statistically-significant global warming since 1995."

My questions are:
1) Who is going to drive up to Al Gore's gated mansion and pass along the bad news?
2) Who is going to strip him of his Nobel Peace Prize and replace it with a No-ball Hysteria Prize?
3) Will this finally kill the ridiculous "carbon credits" scams?
4) Do I get to flick boogers on the windshields of Priuses? (Actually, I can answer that one: No. Unless I go to the Toyota plants where all the recalled Priuses are being fitted with stuff that works. HAHAAAA.)

Got a global warming hysteria problem? Truth finally said: "Relax. I'll handle it."

P.S. Heidi Cullen, fired Heidi Cullen of the Weather Channel, can officially ZIP IT.

Johnny Weir Awesomeness

I'm not big into dudes figure skating. Hockey is more my speed. That being said, I'm more into dudes figure skating than PETA, so Johnny Weir's comments to PETA after they sent him an open letter for wearing some fur on his skating costume were double awesome.

PETA as a collective idea are idiots. I take care of animals. I actually don't wear fur, more because I think it's dumb than for any socially-conscious mindset. I also happen to agree with Weir when he says "people" suffering is more important than "animal" suffering.

If animals could reason, I might start to put them on more equal footing than humans. In the mean time: Top of the Food Chain wins out.

"Crazy fur people." Love it.

NBC is Dumb

Apparently, letting Conan O'Brien ride off into the sunset isn't enough for the turds at NBC. In a move reminiscent of Kruschev's post-Stalin purge in Communist Russia, NBC has removed all of Conan's Tonight Show episodes from NBC.com and Hulu.

Conan is infinitely funnier than Letterman. His writing staff makes Leno's crew look like kindergartners making poo jokes. I get Conan. I am his target demographic. I own that. Kimmel is a neutral.

But to attempt to remove Conan from the TV memory is just an underhanded move designed to try to force viewers back to the sinking Lenoliner.

Relax. I'll handle it.

Joe Biden says "Relax, I'll Handle it."

And VP Biden takes credit along with his boss for all the good things that have happened in Iraq. (At the same time, he rails on W for all the ill that happened there. The late John Murtha handled the besmirching of the Marines in Haditha, so it's all covered.)

Verbal Master Joe said on Larry King, Feb. 10, 2010 (not that I watched that idiot):

Iraq "could be one of the great achievements of this administration. You're going to see 90,000 American troops come marching home by the end of the summer. You're going to see a stable government in Iraq that is actually moving toward a representative government."

Um. No. Joe? Relax, I'll handle it.

Too Repressive for China, Not Enough for the Davos Crowd

As if you needed any additional evidence that the band of idiots that gathers at Davos every year to sit around the table and talk about how awesome they are is bad for global society and the pursuit of freedom, I present you with this not awesome story.

These are the same morons who have coined things like "hands off my uterus" and "global warming will kill us all." Of course, don't touch the uterus, but confiscate the PC (or Mac).

Here's a good idea: Shut up, Davos Economic Forum. I'll handle it.

Vampires are Dumb

If I have to see, hear, or read about another stupid vampire movie, I'm liable to pop an aneurysm. Vampire stories are sooooooo boring. Also boring are the women who fall for vampires like vampires are some sort of sweeeeet man-prize. Seriously. You date him. He bites you. You are a vampire. With pasty white skin. And goth eyes.

Dumb.

Vampire LOL Cats are not dumb.

Al Gore Can Blow it Out His Hairdo

Al Gore along with the English East Anglia coverup charlatans can beat it like Michael Jackson. The collective band of idiots is dead wrong. This winter is the most snowy EVER in Philadelphia.















But...but...it's not global warming anymore! It's "climate change."

No. It's "seasons," and we happen to be in "winter" right now.

Idiots.